Chivalry is on life support
I realize that what I'm about to blog will probably draw angry comments from feminists (and probably men) around the world ... or just the ones who read this blog. But is it too much to ask for a "gentleman" to offer his seat up to a lady?
I take public transportation to work. Most days, I absolutely love it. I can read, listen to my iPod, zone out or whatever without having to worry about ramming into the bumper of the car in front of me or speeding too fast through the traffic cameras. It's a much more relaxing way to start my morning. If the train's running late, there's not much I can do about it so why not kick back, close my eyes and dream about stopping in for a danish at Panera on my way into the office.
I do not enjoy it, however, when I get on the train and have to stand during the whole ride with my heavy bag while wearing a skirt.
I realize that many women fought very hard for equal rights, and I also realize that if it weren't for them, I would probably spend my days wearing an apron, mending my husband's clothes and baking pies. (Side note: Hubby and I actually did make a pie this weekend, and it is fabulous! It's a peach, blueberry and raspberry pie, and I HIGHLY endorse it. And for someone who rebels when her dessert does not contain chocolate, that says a lot!) But it's just POLITE to offer up your seat! Just like it's polite to hold the door open for the person right behind you instead of letting it swing shut in his or her face. I would offer my seat to an elderly person in a second so why shouldn't able-bodied males offer theirs up to the ladies?
The thing is that there are just some mornings where I don't feel well, and standing and hanging on for dear life just doesn't agree with my body. But because I look normal, no one thinks anything of me standing. Maybe this is my hangup, but I really don't feel like tapping someone on the shoulder to explain my medical history. And what drives me crazy the most is when they obviously avoid making eye contact so they don't feel compelled to get up.
Hubby (as well as all of my/our male friends) always offers his seat up to a woman, but I'm beginning to lose faith in most of the men in my Midwestern metropolis. During my stint living in New York, I always saw men offering their subway seats to women. And Midwesterners are supposed to be the friendly ones.
Maybe their mamas should have taught 'em better.
I take public transportation to work. Most days, I absolutely love it. I can read, listen to my iPod, zone out or whatever without having to worry about ramming into the bumper of the car in front of me or speeding too fast through the traffic cameras. It's a much more relaxing way to start my morning. If the train's running late, there's not much I can do about it so why not kick back, close my eyes and dream about stopping in for a danish at Panera on my way into the office.
I do not enjoy it, however, when I get on the train and have to stand during the whole ride with my heavy bag while wearing a skirt.
I realize that many women fought very hard for equal rights, and I also realize that if it weren't for them, I would probably spend my days wearing an apron, mending my husband's clothes and baking pies. (Side note: Hubby and I actually did make a pie this weekend, and it is fabulous! It's a peach, blueberry and raspberry pie, and I HIGHLY endorse it. And for someone who rebels when her dessert does not contain chocolate, that says a lot!) But it's just POLITE to offer up your seat! Just like it's polite to hold the door open for the person right behind you instead of letting it swing shut in his or her face. I would offer my seat to an elderly person in a second so why shouldn't able-bodied males offer theirs up to the ladies?
The thing is that there are just some mornings where I don't feel well, and standing and hanging on for dear life just doesn't agree with my body. But because I look normal, no one thinks anything of me standing. Maybe this is my hangup, but I really don't feel like tapping someone on the shoulder to explain my medical history. And what drives me crazy the most is when they obviously avoid making eye contact so they don't feel compelled to get up.
Hubby (as well as all of my/our male friends) always offers his seat up to a woman, but I'm beginning to lose faith in most of the men in my Midwestern metropolis. During my stint living in New York, I always saw men offering their subway seats to women. And Midwesterners are supposed to be the friendly ones.
Maybe their mamas should have taught 'em better.
posted by Kristen at 3:09 PM
3 Comments:
I'll allow my ire to be drawn. It's no longer practical to be a gentleman. Where I ride, I sometimes look up from my paper and see 5 women. Am I to offer my seat to each of them? In what order? If they decline, am I to insist? I could spend my whole morning being rejected by women that prefer to stand for a variety of reasons. And what about that puny looking man. Should I offer him a seat? If you need a seat, I think you should ask. "May I please sit down, I'm not feeling well," should open up all the seats you need. I would give up my seat in an instant to a person that asked.
I don't tip my hat to folks as I pass them on the street either.
-Dave
I was going to suggest that you carry wear a prosthetic belly on the train so that people will think you're pregnant and be extra motivated to give up their seats, but then I found a link to this article on my cousin's blog, so I'm not sure that would do much good.
Also, the above may demonstrate what happens when a gentlemanly inclined guy dates a girl who doesn't slow down to let him open door for her.
Well, I nod 'hello' to people as I pass them on the street. Maybe that makes me 'small-town,' maybe that makes me too friendly, but at least I'm being polite.
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